There is no doubt that when somebody does something through speech or
action that is hurtful to our feelings, we will feel hurt, upset and
angry...
We have the rights to feel hurt, upset and angry in this very moment when somebody does or says something that is hurtful in this present moment... As that painful feeling of being hurt is a normal reaction towards some speech and action that our mind/ego recognizes as something "hurtful", or it is a consequence derives from somebody's "hurtful" speech and action.
In this very moment when the hurtful speech or action is happening, it is the responsible of that person for his or her "hurtful" speech and action that is causing us to feel hurt in this present moment... But, this is only valid in this very moment when it is happening. Afterwards, if we still continue to feel hurt, upset and angry, then it will be our own responsibility for allowing ourselves continue to be hurt and feel hurt, even though that "hurtful" incident has already gone, it doesn't exist in the reality of the present moment now, but it only exists as part of our memories...
We are the one who is responsible for allowing ourselves continue to be hurt repeatedly over and over again by our own attachment towards our past unhappy memories... This hurt is no longer the responsibility or consequences of other people's hurtful speech and action, but it is our own responsibility...
To love ourselves, to be kind and compassionate towards ourselves, it is our own choice and freedom to free ourselves from continue being hurt by past unhappy happenings or past painful experiences by forgive other people's hurtful speech and action or wrong doings, by letting go of the past instantly...
Memories will still be there, either it will get stronger or gradually fade away, depending on how much energy we feed to them, but they are just a bunch of happy and unhappy memories... We cannot erase all the unhappy memories that we don't like... But for sure, we can practice letting go of the past instantly by letting go of the attachment towards the past experiences whether they are good or bad experiences... Memories will be there coming and going in our mind, but they have no more power to influence us for how we feel in the present moment now...
And in order for us to be able to let go of the past unhappy experiences, we need to know the truth about how come we feel hurt and who is responsible for it?
By understanding the connection between the past memories and our emotions and feelings, and knowing what is going on when we felt hurt in the past and why we continue to feel hurt by the past unhappy experiences in the present moment now, and knowing what is being kind and compassionate towards all being including ourselves is also one of the beings, we need to be kind and compassionate towards ourselves, and love ourselves, we will know that the only way to heal ourselves from painful experiences is by letting go of the past instantly, by practicing forgiveness and letting go...
To forgive other people's wrong and hurtful actions and speech, is being kind and compassionate towards ourselves... Let go of anger and hatred...
Free ourselves from continue being hurt by past unhappy experiences which don't exist in the reality of the present moment now, but only exist as a phantom that lives in our memories playing tricks onto our feelings in the present moment now, which is meaningless and wasting our energy to entertain it...
It is not about denying or ignoring our feelings. It is about to feel or be aware of what we are feeling now in the present moment, allow all these feelings to arise and pass away, and let them go.... It doesn't matter if they are good feelings or bad feelings, happy feelings or unhappy feelings, pleasant feelings or unpleasant feelings, feel or be aware of their presence in this very moment, and let them go...
Be happy.
We have the rights to feel hurt, upset and angry in this very moment when somebody does or says something that is hurtful in this present moment... As that painful feeling of being hurt is a normal reaction towards some speech and action that our mind/ego recognizes as something "hurtful", or it is a consequence derives from somebody's "hurtful" speech and action.
In this very moment when the hurtful speech or action is happening, it is the responsible of that person for his or her "hurtful" speech and action that is causing us to feel hurt in this present moment... But, this is only valid in this very moment when it is happening. Afterwards, if we still continue to feel hurt, upset and angry, then it will be our own responsibility for allowing ourselves continue to be hurt and feel hurt, even though that "hurtful" incident has already gone, it doesn't exist in the reality of the present moment now, but it only exists as part of our memories...
We are the one who is responsible for allowing ourselves continue to be hurt repeatedly over and over again by our own attachment towards our past unhappy memories... This hurt is no longer the responsibility or consequences of other people's hurtful speech and action, but it is our own responsibility...
To love ourselves, to be kind and compassionate towards ourselves, it is our own choice and freedom to free ourselves from continue being hurt by past unhappy happenings or past painful experiences by forgive other people's hurtful speech and action or wrong doings, by letting go of the past instantly...
Memories will still be there, either it will get stronger or gradually fade away, depending on how much energy we feed to them, but they are just a bunch of happy and unhappy memories... We cannot erase all the unhappy memories that we don't like... But for sure, we can practice letting go of the past instantly by letting go of the attachment towards the past experiences whether they are good or bad experiences... Memories will be there coming and going in our mind, but they have no more power to influence us for how we feel in the present moment now...
And in order for us to be able to let go of the past unhappy experiences, we need to know the truth about how come we feel hurt and who is responsible for it?
By understanding the connection between the past memories and our emotions and feelings, and knowing what is going on when we felt hurt in the past and why we continue to feel hurt by the past unhappy experiences in the present moment now, and knowing what is being kind and compassionate towards all being including ourselves is also one of the beings, we need to be kind and compassionate towards ourselves, and love ourselves, we will know that the only way to heal ourselves from painful experiences is by letting go of the past instantly, by practicing forgiveness and letting go...
To forgive other people's wrong and hurtful actions and speech, is being kind and compassionate towards ourselves... Let go of anger and hatred...
Free ourselves from continue being hurt by past unhappy experiences which don't exist in the reality of the present moment now, but only exist as a phantom that lives in our memories playing tricks onto our feelings in the present moment now, which is meaningless and wasting our energy to entertain it...
It is not about denying or ignoring our feelings. It is about to feel or be aware of what we are feeling now in the present moment, allow all these feelings to arise and pass away, and let them go.... It doesn't matter if they are good feelings or bad feelings, happy feelings or unhappy feelings, pleasant feelings or unpleasant feelings, feel or be aware of their presence in this very moment, and let them go...
Be happy.
